This one is from the draft heap. It’s a fragment but a goody I think. Approximate date sometime around February 2013. I assume my sister was at my house while I helped her with her taxes but who knows anymore.

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I’m really tired of telemarketers. My sister answered the phone today and heard music, puzzled she handed the phone to me, and I waited and heard “Sorry to keep you waiting. If you are unable to hold please call [800#]”. . . excuse me? You called me, why am I on hold?! So I called their 800# and it turns out it’s a collection company for a loan. I don’t have a loan. I don’t owe anyone any money. I haven’t even been late on my water bill. I wait on hold again and get someone who tells me that I don’t have an account with them and they’re not sure why I’d be getting a call but they imagine someone entered a number incorrectly and that’s why. So I ask to be put on their do not call list. They don’t have one. I ask to have my number removed from their database. They can’t. You can’t? “I’m sorry, we can’t look things up by phone number. Only account or name.” I said I’d like to talk to a supervisor because someone can look it up by phone number, I know, I do database work. She said she couldn’t transfer me to a supervisor because I’m not a customer of theirs and I don’t have an account. AUGH.

Insert slow blinks, tire kicks and head desks right here.